Brandon K. Nobles – Reflections in a Silver Spoon

Two letters and one cassette
And the letter comes too late.
then the fan goes out on pills
and the writer gets the bill
The letter just to say you could have saved me
had you cared or called
And here again the slave to words
from the mind to pen as words to you
to take me out of hell and help,
and hold and somehow tell
that you would’ve saved me if i called for help
You could’ve saved me from myself.

Someone to understand,
who else,
and in on the joke, who saw,
under the microscope, and all
who threw it in the trash just like
father
and the crumpled paper formed to say
two more pills and i won’t feel
the day i was thrown away
the paper ball abandoned say,
“Somebody save me from myself.”
The thumb it squeezes
loud and dumb
until I’m off again and dumb.
The pen’s obituary spun.

You could have done
the song and dance for me
the only one I’d need to be
a raison d’etre just to see
a smile in the mirror like the rest
the rest of those who smile
you could have rescued me
from desolation drive
and took me to the miracle mile
where i could sleep without a pill
and rest:
in a cozy bird like nest,
like home
I wake:
Alone again, broken inside,
a mind whose bars
blot out the stars
with constellations on the arms.

I could have been a normal guy
no novels poems or how or why
no stories to tell
no silent voice to yell through pens
to words heard in the mind;
the pen attends, atones again

When it was then, and now I know
my story and how it wrote:
screamed help when no one heard,
just eyes above the words to sigh.
We can’t be seen from in the sky.

Another kid is trapped inside
the purple prison of the mind
trying to move and get outside
to kiss the lips of Suicide,
collapse,

The echo of the spoon relapse
goodbye, don’t cry, no why
Soon it will be for you and me,
just like they say
tomorrow will become
another yesterday

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